Friday, May 15, 2015
Bad news for people who like good news
With my present degree of liver damage, my cirrhosis is beyond repair. What's left of my liver is riddled with an ever voracious virus. My body writhes in pain from the ever-worsening side effects. The referred pain in my shoulder has become a now constant reminder as I attempt to sleep.
With each failure I come to new introspection.
To count I have failed:
Interferon and Ribavirin twice.
Interferon, Ribavirin and Incivek (the triple cocktail which cured my mother).
Sovaldi and Olysio.
And now, I have failed Harvoni.
As an aside, I want to explain that I am not typical. If you have Hep C, do not expect these results, know that I am the extreme.
I have struggled to find the words to truly encapsulate the fear, dread, and ultimately sadness that have overcome me. So please forgive my brevity.
While on Sovaldi and Olysio, I cleared the virus, but it came back with a vengeance. Harvoni allowed me to clear the virus faster, and for longer, however it too failed me.
I have escaped death a handful of times from complications as a result of my decompensated liver.
But here I am. I shall not die so easily. We are all endowed with the insatiable human spirit, whose passion shall not be relinquished to something so small.
And now I must pause, before I look forward.
So that I may know my bearing, to find a suitable course.
More blood tests are coming to closer analyze my virus.
For what is a patient without patience?
I found out the results yesterday, and as I've slowly told people I am glad to say I am truly blessed to have such great friends and family.
I am exceptional.
To quote the late John Paul Jones:
"I have not yet begun to fight."